Archive for April 3rd, 2009


The Mobility Scooters…Of DOOM!

This is one of ‘those’ posts, where I have a sneeky feeling I’m going to be waffling all over the place.

Firstly, I’m listening to far too much Ultravox. the new releases, remastered at Apple studios (by folks who Im fairly sure don’t really know the tracks – seriously, listen to The Voice on the Monument CD – the last round of the chorus where Midge extends ‘they tryyyyyeeeeyyyeeeeee’ – you can hear that they’ve tried to drop in a normal ‘they try, they try’ – or whatever the bloody lyric is, can’t be arsed to look it up – recovering from yesterday, more on that in a moment.) Aside from that little gripe they are actually rather nice. Though surely theres more then enough material from the old Hammersmith Odeon gigs to come up with a complete concert, rather then releasing the tracks piecemeal. Every reissue of Monument always sees one or two more tracks added – this time it’s ‘The Song (We Go)’. Dammit people… a FULL concert please, yeah? Ok, so I have full concerts…but they are bootlegs (far, far too many, tbh, lol) and a little on the rough side.

Talking of Ultravox – and I do, often – I’ll be at the Hammersmith Apollo gig on 24th April. Also, Jo – the young lady from  here appears to have somehow booked two tickets for the Roundhouse gig when they’ll be filming the dvd. Look out for a wobbly idiot in denim.

Hmm..that could be a lot of us, now I think that through a bit more.

However, I’m actually being horribly busy atm. Went to Tavern last night – again, more on that in a mo – I have the two Ultravox gigs at the end of the month then in the middle of May I’m at the Roundhouse again for the Radiophonic Workshop gig. Since when did I go to gigs? I mean, the odd Midge thingy, small scale, provincial theatre setting etc…but me? The Hammersmith Apollo? The Roundhouse? What the…?

Think I may need a bit of a lie down at the end of it all, lol. And my finances may need to be put on life support. Someone asked if I’m ill etc, why am I going to London? I politely said that no way was I going to give up – I may find it scary, stairs and I on the Underground are a source of great entertainment, I suffer the following day big time and I have NO idea how I’m going to hold up at concerts, but I ain’t going to give in, ok? Plus, just cos I’m ill doesn’t mean I have to stay at home. I AM actually ALLOWED to go out. I got secretly a bit miffed that that person seemed to think that cos Im ill I shouldn’t be able to do anything.


So, Tavern. To those that don’t know, the Fitzroy Tavern, on the corner of Charlotte Street and Windmill Street, central London, is where, on the first Thursday of the month, Doctor Who fans meet up, get rather drunk and live in the past – well, except those that are ‘professionals’ who just go to network and look important.  I don’t often go nowadays, but it is great to meet old freinds and last night was rather good for that as, for some strange reason, a lot of folks who hadn’t been in years turned up. Plus I thought, as Jo likes Doctor Who – though isn’t obsessed like myself, lol – what the hell, lets go to the pub and have a laugh. Face facts, if she can handle Tavern she can handle anything. So it was a good evening all round. I drank far too much Rum n Coke – though, oddly, I just don’t get drunk on the stuff. This, I think, is a Good Thing. And yes, I’m not supposed to drink, really, well, the odd one or two. Tough. I hardly ever touch alchohol nowadays – not cos of pills etc, but, well…I think I may have grown out of the ‘getting whamoooed’ thing – though when my dad recently popped over, the gift of a large bottle of rum was truly appreciated, lol.

Suffering today, mind, lol. Not hangover, but acheyness and legs deciding they belong to someone else. No one to blame but myself, but it was worth it, trust me. 🙂

Now then. I have a freind/neighbour – let’s call her Bert – that I have mentioned before. Lovely woman, and someone I admire greatly for her dignity and determination in coping with her disabilities. Before her son left for the US, he popped onto E-Bay and bought her a mobility scooter. The thing arrived and, never quite worked properly. It tended to stop and start whenever it wanted to and the battery also did its own thing. It got to a point that the bloody thing would cut out – no power and nothing on earth could shift it – RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE OF THE MAIN ROAD. Every bloody time! Same place. After deep consultation, we agreed that the thing was possessed and was trying to kill Bert. It now resides in her dining room, lurking, waiting to pounce.

Though the cats love the comfy seat.

Imagine my interest when I hear about this story on BBC Radio Four and looked on the net for it…

They want to take over the world and kill us all!!!

I am now deeply suspcious of mobility scooters. Have you noticed just how many more seem to be appearing? Have you? Have you staked out your local Shopmobility store?

Stay alert, people. These things will kill us all!

Oh, and to the person who told someone they thought this blog was ‘crap’, well, I expect no less from someone with such a nasty, derogatory side to them – at least I don’t try to retain my youth by following the latest bandwagon or trend and then sneer at anyone who may be capable of keeping a cheerful disposition.

You got old. Learn to live with it without taking it out on others.

Sorry, but that needed saying.


It is crap, though, lol